First learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak.

I am having issues of the communication kind again at the moment.

We live in an exceedingly communicative world, be it facebook, blogging, BlackBerry, iPhone, SMS, email and the seemingly endless options we seem to have to converse and communicate on many levels.

I find myself in a situation where I have caused great offense to somebody because it took me a little under two hours to respond to a BlackBerry Messenger message (despite the fact that it had taken that person over an hour to respond to my original message, which I was and am not offended by).

I would like to know what the rules are regarding all these new forms of communication?  How does one avoid causing offense by not responding - and who decides what is a reasonable time to respond to the latest comment on a facebook status, or the BBM stating that the other half is leaving work, or an SMS that is actually just the latest sick joke regarding some celebrity or other?!

Whatever happened to just calling?

Are we embracing modern technology or are we really imprisoning ourselves in a web of GPS, Instant Messaging and Social Networking?

As I walk through the shadow of the valley...

... I shall fear no evil.

These immortal words that everybody knows, no matter what their faith is - be it Abrahamic, Ayurvedic or otherwise, these word are timeless and yet I question their very meaning.  I sometimes get afraid, very afraid.

I have been feeling a lot of fear this week - though not in a state of mind.  as in I have not been afriad of some act or danger etc.  I have been feeling intense reverance and awe towards my personal belief system.

As I quite often do, this has made me think about faith.  I have read of all sorts of things about what I would perceive as being an atrocity that the perpatrators have told they were given instruction by their own god to carry out.  I think we all know that fear can extinguish the brightest of lights, like a star in the galaxy that implodes and turns itself into a black hole - a hole in which there is an endless nothing.

This is a particularly holy time of the year in the Hindu calendar.  It is widely known that I have adopted a large part of this religion in so far as is possible with my limited knowledge and yet external influences have taken me away from certian practices this week.

I have been trying to keep myself positive for my team, clients, candidates, friends, fellow gym goers, etc.  all of this with an overwhelming feeling of... well....  fear.  Fear of what I do not know, retirbution for not humbling myself this week.

This morning whilst on the train to Manchester I nodded off, and I woke up with four words running around in my head: "Love.  Fate.  Hope.  Destiny"  all immaterial and unmanageable things, this just made me feel even more overwhelmed.

I am normally a very positive person with a good perspective on things...  but as I type another quote has entered my mind: “An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of preaching.”

I am afraid.

Can we get what we're fighting for?

I recently read that in the known history of the world...  the WHOLE history...  there have only been 29 years in which there has been no documented wars or fighting.  29 years in the known history of the world.  Even the holy books that a lot of people live their lives by are built upon a foundation of fighting...  Is it any wonder everyone is so angry.

In Hinduism the Mahabarata is one of the two great epics, in which The Book of Effort tells us the story of the battle between brothers.  In the Qur'an 2:191 we are given permission to slay where there is opression, Christianity the bible records many wars and in fact the story of Jesus' rise and fall in itself is a war.  This has gotten me to thinking...

In the modern world, we have television, the internet, numerous daytime shat shows helping us to decide 'what is worth fighting for'.  I mean, at this moment in time we've even got Cheryl Cole reminding us that 'love' is worth fighting for.

In our careers we widely acknowledge that being good at what we do and going that extra mile wherever possible will get us to where we want to be...  we dont 'fight' with our bosses or the coporate giants, we excel at what we do, work on our weaknesses and therefore our career moves steadfastly onwards.  In personal lives we seem to want to 'fight' for everything and not bother about the hard work.

Relatonships are hard work on a massive scale, for example, the relationship between The Americas and The Middle East, relationships are also hard work on a smaller scale, for example, my boyfriend and I.  I wont disclose his name on here so we'll just refer to him as 'him' for now... We have never been in a position where we have 'fought' for one anothers attentions, oh don't get me wrong we dont by any means have a 'perfect' relationship (whatever one of those is) but even our break up for a short while a year ago was relatively controlled with a few nasty words being scattered like the landmines in the middle east, ready to spontaneously explode with no warning with complete indiscrimination as to what they destroyed...

So, my wondering is this... how do we ever decide what is worth fighting for and how do we decide if it's even worth the fight in the first place?

Nuts

Okay so its been some time since I've written for you guys... So I'm on the lovely Bakerloo Line travelling southbound from the beautiful few hours I have spent on a squirrel hunt with a friend of mine in Regents Park... I got to wondering about the things we look for in life...

Most of the people I know are constantly on a quest for something, be it the perfect show, the hair product that will make your hair stand up all night but wont give you spots for the next week (because you gone to sleep pissed and rolled around on your pillow in a stupor all night) or that certain someone who is supposed to be 'the other half of us'...

My friend doesn't understand my love for these rats in cuter outfits. I mean, don't get me wrong, he can see the potential they have for making a pretty scarf but nothing beyond that...

"Squirrel!" I holler while my friend is mid-sentence about his sexual escapades in Regents Park.
"I love how you keep screaming like a 2 year old whenever you see a squirrel". He says with a snigger.
Its true, I am hollering In my pseudo american accent whenever I see one, its little wonder the damn things won't come near me...

We did come across one friendly little creature, when we least expected it... I delve within my Gaultier messenger bag and pull out some of the nuts I have brought with me... The little guy eagerly looks and me, weighs me up for a second, decides he trusts me and clambers up my leg to take the nuts from my hand...

Its often said that we get what we want when we don't really know that we want it, and especially when we don't know its coming... is it fate or is it really a simple case of getting your nuts out in the park?
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device